Category: Fun, Funny or Weird

What I’ve Learned…

As I’ve Matured…

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in…

I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others – they are more screwed up than you think.

I’ve learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

I’ve learned that I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.

I’ve learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

I’ve learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the ass are permanent.

Continue reading What I’ve Learned…

Top 46 Things To Do In An Elevator

LOL…

My favourites are:

2.Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
3.Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: “Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!”
21.Frown and mutter “gotta go, gotta go” then sigh and say “oops!”
23.Sing “Mary had a little lamb” while continually pushing buttons.
26.Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce “You’re one of THEM!” and move to the far corner of the elevator.
38.Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your “personal space.”
41.Blow spit bubbles.
43.Announce in a demonic voice: “I must find a more suitable host body.”

For the full list, go here.

Ketchup ‘hero’ dismissed

An Indian soldier who used tomato ketchup to fake his claim for a bravery medal has been dismissed from service.

Colonel H.S. Kohli, who commanded an artillery regiment in Assam, tried to present photographs of civilians splashed with ketchup as ‘enemy casualties’.

But the fraud came to light while authorities were processing his claims for an award.

The army officer was tried and found guilty in a court martial while a major who connived with him in the fake encounter, faces a five-year suspension.

How pathetic, lol…

[Via: Ananova]

Body Advertising

So, what do you know. After infesting our tvs, radios, magazines, streets, websites, pringles chips, skies and even space, advertisers might start advertising on the human body too.

For example, for only $20 anyone can rent Chris Pirillo’s chest for their brand or blog advertising.

Or you could be paid a lot of money for getting a tatoo of some company’s logo on your body through TatAD.

I can’t believe advertising has actually gone this far.
You can’t help but ask, what next? or to be more precise, where next?

[Via: Loic Le Meur]

Voters Offered Free Striptease

Ukrainian voters are being offered a free striptease in a bid to win their votes for a presidential candidate.

Campaigners for current Prime Minister Viktor Yanukovich organised the free striptease shows in the Santa Fe bar in Donetsk hoping they could get people to re-elect their man, local media reported.

One organiser said: “We hope the voters will remember who gave them this show for free when they go to the ballot box.”

They sure will remember!

Now if only we had elections like that, lol…
Just kidding, of course 😛

[Via: Ananova]